More Billyware Failure as MICROSOFT ZUNE CRASHES

In a note of Hilarity (Only because I did not buy a piece of chit MICROSOFT ZUNE,) Every single 30GIG ZUNE seems to have CRASHED at the same time last time. Sometime around 2AM this morning, every MICROSOFT ZUNE on the planet seems to have FROZEN ON THE START-UP SCREEN.

This really does not come as that much of a surprise to me, the moment I found out MICROSOFT and Billy were reponsible fo this attempt at a byte of the APPLE (OK cheap pun I know) I figured the ZUNE was prone to FAILURE.

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Initial reports on the massive ZUNE CRASH indicate MICROSOFT does not have any comments or idea of what went wrong. Not since the day after Christmas has the Internet seen this much interest in the MICROSOFT ZUNE. Today searches are around the terms ZUNE CRASH, ZUNE SUPPORT, ZUNE, ZUNE RESET, ZUNE STUCK ON LOADING SCREEN, ZUNE HARD RESET, ZUNE VIRUS, ZUNE HELP, ZUNE SUPPORT and many many more. At Christmas, the searches related more to LOADING SONGS ONTO YOUR ZUNE.

I guess the team of brainiacs at MICROSOFT will be working into the New Year to solve this problem with the ZUNE putting off any plans for game of "pin the tail on the geek" and everyones favorite "Spank Billy"

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If you are a victim of the ZUNE CRASH, or ZUNE VIRUS as the case may be, getting in touch with ZUNE SUPPORT though any of this might just be a little bit of a problem as servers stuggle to keep up with the ZUNE CRASH Queries.


Related:

MASSIVE MICROSOFT ZUNE FAILURE

A little local Cheerleader news

In local news this week, well ok back in November, a group of North Delta Cheerleaders decided to prounce (Is that a word) through the Football field pretty much naked. Wearing nothing but tight bootie shorts or thongs, pieces of tape and paint, these High School seniors gave spectators more than they expected.

Ted Johnson, in his first year as principal at South Delta Secondary, said he was unaware the students planned to bare almost all at the home game. Johnson said he was “very disappointed” upon hearing about the girls’ behaviour, and talked to the seniors about how the “seemingly innocent prank” impacts the school and staff. “From the school’s perspective we’re trying to take an educational route,” said Johnson.

He said the girls talked of the pressure to uphold a school tradition at the Sun Devils’ final home game, although he did not know when the last such nearly nude performance had taken place. The students were warned that such actions, especially by members of the graduating class, could result in fewer teachers willing to sponsor graduation events such as the upcoming Christmas dance. Teachers should be able to attend school-sanctioned events like football games without being made to feel embarrassed, said Johnson. “It was an awkward, uncomfortable place to be for teachers.”

Delta’s assistant superintendent Dianne Turner was watching the football game with her husband and saw the halftime show. She said she was shocked, but added, “I’ve been in high school as an administrator for many years, and teenagers do make mistakes, and you work with them.” Turner said she and Johnson talked to the girls about finding ways to bring pride to the community. “We sent them away to think about what kind of event they might create,” she said, such as a greatly choreographed dance routine.

Johnson wanted to clarify that the cheerleaders were not a sanctioned school group sponsored by a teacher. However, he said he impressed upon them they are representatives of the school to other school communities. “And for the visiting team, it’s not something that is, ‘Wow, this is great.’ There’s an element of intimidation,” said Johnson.

The Sun Devils did win amidst the controversy, 20-14 over the Panthers. The squad competes in district playoffs this weekend.

Spanking to NUDE NAMINTHA VIDEO

Today's hot search babe of the day is BOLLYWOOD actress NAMINTHA. You see, NAMINTHA was recently caught on camera NAKED. From the description of the NUDE NAMINTHA VIDEO, it seems NAMINTHA was TAKING OFF HER DRESS when she was caught on camera from the behind. NAMITHA then turned around EXPOSING HER NAKED BREASTS for the world to see.
NAMITHA is now the first BOLLYWOOD actress to be featured on HOLAMAMASITA. To see more PICTURES OF NAMINTHA, check out NAMITHA SHOWS ALL

There are already many horny individuals offering sums of money to see the NAKED NAMINTHA VIDEO.

CHINESE CENSORSHIP - Woman known as HUANG PORN arrested for EAST BUILDING KAPPA GIRL PORN MOVIE

Interesting little tidbit over the last few days. Things like this are what make it great to live in a democratic society where the government does not mess with our ability to masturbate to naked chicks on camera.

Google started to go nuts yesterday with searches for HUANG PORN. The reason being, some woman name HUANG who lives in CHINA was arrested for filming herself involved in "SEX ACTS." This HUANG PORN VIDEO now known as "EAST BUILDING KAPPA GIRL PORNO" after the KAPPA Department store HUANG worked in is now a hot DOWNLOAD on BITTORRENT and the Chinese PEER-TO-PEER application XUNLEI. I guess not even the CHINESE GOVERNMENT cant stop BITTORRENT or P2P DOWNLOADS of HUANG's EAST KAPPA GIRL PORNO MOVIE

You see, HUANG posted this VIDEO of herself HAVING SEX on her blog under HUANG PORN and EAST BUILDING KAPPA GIRL PORNO.

You can read more about the ongoing saga of HUANG and her PORNO EAST BUILDING KAPPA GIRL
here

mmmm JENNIFER ANISTON

As per normal, I did my typical google hot terms search this morning and noticed JENNIFER ANISTON up there again. Of course for the JENNIFER ANISTON GQ PICTORIAL.
Well anyways, JENNIFER ANISTON WAS ON DAVID LETTERMAN last night and she gave the nightitme geek the tie from the photoshoot. I'm sure Dave is at home right now rubbing the tie all over himself.

Here is the JENNIFER ANISTON DAVID LETTERMAN INTERVIEW.






Jennifer Aniston says her naked photo for the cover of an American men’s magazine was an accident because the shoot was intended to expose her in mere “moments of undress”. Aniston features on the GQ cover posing in a red and white striped tie, but insists she didn’t quite intend to fully strip down, imdb.com reports.

She said: “There was a theme to that photoshoot. It was supposed to be moments of undress - starting off in a gown, and then the men were in their tuxedos, then we were going to have me in one of their shirts and then their pants and then somehow that all went out of the window and then there just ended up being a tie.”

To see more of the Beautiful JENNIFER ANISTON Visit http://holamamasita.blogspot.com

Virgin Mary nude on the cover of Mexican Playboy - Banging at the Gates of Hell

AH, what better way to start off a saturday morning than with a little contraversy. And, of course, what better source of contraversy than the Catholic Church. Well, not really the Catholic Church, although I am sure they will get their 2 cents in.

It seems, like the Mexian Playboy Magazine has decided to feature a NUDE VIRGIN MARY on the cover of Mexico Playboy. This more is just days before a major Mexican festival dedicated to the mother of Jesus.

Not to miss this opportunity, check out the cover of Mexico Playboy featuring, noen other than, the Virgin Mary... Or at least a Nude statuesque representation of her.

Now where is my box of Kleenex and bottle of lotion.


For more on this Story

Playboy Features Nude Virgin Mary Cover

KFC Moments - KFC Girls get national Attention after MySpace Pictures in the Sink

Of all the things to make you sick at KFC, one of the Anderson California Kentucky Fried Chicken said the pictures of the "KFC Girls" posted on MySpace under the heading "KFC Moments" made her sick to her stomach. Although these three KFC Girls are not really all that attractive, in fact one of them looks like she has been eating too much KFC, Sick to the stomach does not really come to mind.

Regardless, KFC Headquarters swiftly fired the Bikini Clad bathers issuing a statement on how their actions violated restaurant health policies. I guess coating America's arteries with Chicken fat is perfectly healthy.\

Related Articles

For more of the MySpace KFC MOMENTS Pictures of the Bikini Clad KFC Girls

Dasha Astafievas The Playboy 50th Anniversary Playmate

Meet Dasha Astafievas, the recently announce Playboy 50th Anniversary Playmate. Even in his Viagra fueled old age, Hef has definately not lost his taste in women. He truly knows what men desire in women.

Born in the Ukraine, Dasha Astafievas won Stars Factory, which is a Ukranian reality TV program. Yes reality television is sweeping the planet, which is why she would fit right in with Kendra and the Girls Next Door. Kendra is reportedly taking Dasha Astafievas presence very hard, as she is the serious one in the sort-of-polygamist relationship who wants to have the 86 year old Hef’s baby. We are for Hef in this one, and hope everyone can get along. Watch the program to see for yourself if these rumors are true and how they are handled.

After her victory, Dasha Astafieva started a musical career and worked as a hot fashion model. She posed nude for Playboy Ukraine, and was subsequently featured as Playboy's Playmate of the Year for 2007.

Related Articles

DASHA ASTAFIEVAS 50th ANNIVERSARY PLAYBOY PLAYMATE

http://nakedfamouswomen.blogspot.com/2008/08/dasha-astafievas-hefs-new-ukranian-babe.html

Cat Bowling

Cat Bowling



Let me start by saying, I hate cats. This is a perfect game for the cat hater in many of us. Check out Cat Bowling.

Spankin' to Naked pictures of Megan Fox

Although this story as well as the pictures are fairly old, everyone seems to be searching for more Naked Megan Fox pictures today. For those who haven't seen the very spankable Naked Megan Fox Pictures yet, you can always go check out the various HTBW Blogs dedicated the the very Beautiful Megan Fox. For purely high resolution naked pictures of Megan Fox, check out http://meganfoxtopless.blogspot.com
If you are more interested in the life and times of Megan Fox as well as a few other pictures of the Sexy Goddess that is Megan fox, check out the Megan Fox blog at http://meganthefox.blogspot.com
If, on the other hand, you are not picky about which beautiful woman you see naked you can also check out http://nakedfamouswomen.blogspot.com

Everyone wants to See Joan Bush

Joan Bush pictures seem to be the hot comodity in the geeknet today. I guess since she got married, everyone wants to see what the Joan Bush Bride looks like. So I looked and looked for Joan Bush Pictures and found quite a few pictures of Joan Biaz as well as George and Jenna Bush. However, I don't thing that is what the general public is looking for in Joan Bush Pictures.
So here you go, a photo gallery of Joan Bush Pictures.... Well at least once I find some pictures of Joan Bush. If Joan Bush ends up being a hottie, you can bet you will find Sexy Joan Bush pictures in either http://holamamasita.blogspot.com or if they are naked Joan Bush Pictures check out http://nakedfamouswomen.blogspot.com

Tina Sherman Nude Photo's

Ah, there is nothing better to harden the penis than some sexy pictures of a beautiful naked woman. Today's naked search is all about that. Some dolt of a husband accidentally left his cellphone (which contained naked pictures of his wife Tina Sherman) in an Arkansas McDonalds. Of course we all know the mentality of people from that area... Isn't Bill Clinton from there? Anyways, aside from incest there is nothing those from Arkansas enjoy more than tities, even those from a non-relative.

To add to the story, McDonalds is now getting sued because their minimum wage employee's posted those pictures on the internet. Apparently it embarassed Tina Sherman and her husband so much, they had to move. Man, she must have really been ugly.

Here's some food for thought: If you have nude photos of your wife on your cell phone, hang onto it.

Phillip Sherman of Arkansas learned that lesson after he left his phone behind at a McDonald's restaurant and the photos ended up online. Now he and his wife, Tina, are suing the McDonald's Corp., the franchise owner and the store manager.

The suit was filed Friday and seeks a jury trial and $3 million in damages for suffering, embarrassment and the cost of having to move to a new home.

The suit says that Phillip Sherman left the phone the Fayetteville store in July and that employees promised to secure it until he returned.

Manager Aaron Brummley declined to comment, and other company officials didn't return messages.

For butt loads of NAKED PICTURES go here

Lisa Guerrero Highly sought after hottie

Although it does not seem to have hit Googles' top 100, Lisa Guerrero seems to be a hot internet comodody over the last few days. You see, I have this other blog with several NAKED PICTURES OF LISA GEURRERO and it has been burning up with hits. This is definately understandable as LISA GUERRERO is one hot tamale.

The question that comes to my mind though is, Why now? It has been a little while since the LISA GUERRERO PLAYBOY issue came to stands. I don't think it is the most recent Lisa Guerrero blog in the LA Times on communication tips for single fathers raising daughters. If that was the case, landing on a page showing naked pictures of Lisa Guerrero would kind of be a little more than disturbing, although definately penis awakening. Perhaps the millions of single dad's reading the Lisa Guerrero blog decided to go out on the prowl for a hottie like Lisa. hmmm the mind wonders.

For more on Lisa Guerrero check out this link

Oh ya, didja hear, the Spitzer whore Ashley Dupre is still grasping for her 15 minutes. If this is what turns your crank, you can find tons of pictures of the nose job queen on the ASHLEY DUPRE BLOG

Spankin' to the 80's Debbie Gibson Style

Ah, I love the naked women hot trends. It gives me a chance to see naked pictures of hot babes who's nude pictures were not previously known to me.
Take for example Debbie Gibson, the Spank attraction of many a horny teenager. Of course, looking at her age now, it was perfect at the time. She is right around my age. So what better time for Debbie to show us her beautifully matured breasts. Sure they are smaller than some, and maybe they droop a tiny bit. Come on people, this is Debbie Gibson nude..... Time to pull out the spank jelly.

To see the full set of naked Debbie Gibson Playboy pictures

Live Puppy Camera has internet viewers full of Awe

OK, the internet must be a really boring place. The latest craze seems to be the PUPPY CAMERA or BOX OF PUPPIES also known as PUPPYCAM and PUPPY WEBCAM. So, for those who are interested, here is the live video feed of a couple of puppies. When I last looked, it was just an empty bed, who knows, maybe they were off taking a good hard shit.

Video chat rooms at Ustream

Fi fi fo mama bee by bo pama Obama - Barack Obama First "Black" President of the USA

So the democrats won. I don't have too much time to talk about it right now as I am about to make breakfast and the Cable guy is coming over to get me some faster 'ninernet. The thing I found interesting about this whole thing is the Google Search results on the topic of the election. The number 1 search term was McCain succession speech while Obama only hit 23 for his acceptance. hmmmmm, is the American public hoping for blood or tears? maybe a few racial rantings from John McCain.

I know everyone is going on about Obama being the First Black President of the United States, but is he really?? Black I mean. Ya ok, before Obama was born his Honkey Mother went out looking for some black dick and came across this guy from Zimbabwe or something. She gets knocked up, the "father" walks out on the relationship (Kids probably cramped his style.) Now Obama grows up as a black man??? I'm confused, yes, ok he looks the part but does he really have any of the exposure. Unless of course his single mother kept on the path of boinking every black penis that said yes I'm guessing his exposure to the culture was somewhat minimal.

I guess that is why he won, he looks the part without all that wannabe gangsta 'tude. looks like he was white enough to even win over some of those red necks from the bible belt. I guess he played the God card so that won them over.

Oh, wife wants breakfast... time to go.

Just as a point of interest, here are the Google Search stats

1. mccain concession speech
2. inauguration day 2009 tickets
3. moscow has the world s greatest number of what
4. popular vote results
5. alaska senate race
6. illinois election results by county
7. minneapolis star tribune
8. video obama victory speech
9. portland press herald
10. popular vote 2008 election
11. ohio election results 2008
12. final electoral map
13. minnesota senate race results
14. us senate election results
15. norm coleman
16. california prop 8 poll results
17. moscow palaces
18. ted stevens election
19. what states did obama win
20. columbus dispatch
21. al franken senate race
22. coleman franken
23. barack obama acceptance speech
24. north carolina election results
25. dayton daily news

Further down the list seems to be something about Michelle Obama's Dress.

Set your Clocks back and don't forget to vote

This week the Americans finally get rid of Dubbya... at least until another one of the Bush clan decide to run for Presidency. I find it kind of ironic that this momentous day is being held on the day which reminds us of how stupid George Bush and his policies are. Take for example this whole time change thing. George in his infinate stupidity decided he wanted to leave a legacy behind. Most reputable (Ya ok no such thing) politicians would like to leave something like world peace or ending world hunger maybe even reducing greenhouse gases with some MEANINGFUL legislation or funding.

Knowing that the world hates him, he doesn't care about the feeding habbits of others and he thought greenhouse gases came from Mexicans flatulating in the Tomato greenhouses bush did what he does best.... Irritate the general public.

Thanks to Georgie North Americans are now out of sync with the rest of the world for 1 month out of the year.

Set your clocks back 1 hour today people.

Everyone wants to see Anne Heche Nude

I know alot of people hate ANNE HECHE because of how she used Ellen Degeneres to achieve fame. Personally, I just like looking at ANNE HECHE.
Anne Heche is a very beautiful woman and by the look of the search stats I am not the only person who would love to see NUDE PICTURES OF ANNE HECHE. The term anne heche nude is moving its' way up the Google Search trends so I did a little looking around and came up with these pictures of ANNE HECHE NUDE.

Enjoy these pictures of ANNE HECHE NUDE on HTBW Blog Naked Famous Women

Spankin' to Tiffany Shepherd and Tyra

Tiffany Shepherd Wants her Job back

I thought this story was dead as a slimy cod long ago. It appears Tiffany Shepherd has successfully re-launched the fame train with a recent appearance on the Tyra Banks Show.

You may remember this bikini clad beauty from earlier this year when Tiffany Shepherd bounced into the media spotlight after an interview on CNN. You see, Tiffany Shepherd was a teacher (I which I had teachers like her as a kid) anyways, Tiffany Shepherd was moonlighting as a Bikini hostess on a fishing boat (Insert joke here)

According to Tiffany Shepherd, she was fired as a teacher when bikini clad pictures of her surfaced on the internet. The school board, on the other hand, insists she was fired because of her many late and no shows for work.

Tiffany Shepherd is a single mom with many sexy assets. Personally, I would love to get hold of her private parts and lick her all over until she squirms in ecstacy, but for some reason she rarely answers my emails. hmmmmmm

For more pictures and information on Tiffany Shepherd, check out the Original Tiffany Shepherd Blog at http://tiffanyshepherd.blogspot.com

National Chocolate Day????

Now I wonder who came up with this one??? Just in time for Christmas gift time out pops NATIONAL CHOCOLATE DAY.
Usually I jump all over these silly commemorative days and call them silly and useless. Not that a national chocolate day is overly useful, after all when is the last time a chocolate bar saved the world or ended a war?

On the other hand, it is entirely possible a good chocolate bar or box of them could do exactly that. Personally, I like Hagensborg Chocolates. The company is local and the owner is really quite nice. (Read as Friendly, funny, Charitable and Hot.) Not that her appearance has anything to do with the quality of chocolate, I just had to mention it because.... well I am a guy and that is what we do, we observe the important things in life.

Their whole marketing strategy is very princess like and their chocolates are mostly in the shape of frogs (Frog prince that kind of thing.) Honestly, I think the marketing scheme is pure genius and the chocolates or Truffles are out of this world Orgasmic (Froggasmic as the owner joked one time.) Honestly, between her and her chocolates, I'm surprised I fit into my pants.

I like to keep a box of Truffle pigs, particularly the Mocha or Peanut butter ones in my truck at all times, first of all it gives me something to snack on and secondly it is a great promotional thing I like to give to customers every once in awhile. Nothing makes a person happier than receiving a nice chocolate bar that is soooooo good it makes their loins quiver in sexual Ecstasy... Yes, I need to get layed.

Anyways, if this has at all piqued your interest, check out the Hagensborg website at http://www.hagensborg.com where you can see the local stores which stock the chocolate delight

Been Caught Cheating - The Dr. Phil and Oprah Story

The rumour mill is pumping this morning with a flurry of searches on Dr. Phil Cheating on his wife. Search terms include Dr. Phil Cheating, Dr. Phil Affair, dr phil divorce, dr phil, dr phil cheating, dr phil caught cheating, and of course the one who started it all oprah.

Maybe Dr. PHIL WAS CAUGHT CHEATING WITH OPRAH. Now there is a juicy rumour. Of course it might not be all that far off, think about it. Oprah Winfrey and whatshisface have been in the media for their apparently dysfunctional relationship maybe Dr. Phil came in to console her and one thing led to another wam bam thank you ma am and Dr. Phil sticks his penis in Oprah just like a rectal thermometer.

Ok, now that was a little too vivid for just before breakfast.

For more information on the Dr. Phil Divorce story

RealtyTrac at the top of Search engine stats again - Beware of the Wolf in Sheeps' clothing

With the economy taking a big dive into the shit tank and real estate forclosures running faster than crap through a goose a certain subscription based "Service" is popular among internet searchers today.

REALTYTRAC is a company which, among other things, tracks public information. They also come up with publicity building "press releases" which do nothing more than promote their product. Which, if you are interested, is a subscription based "service" which provides subscribers with access to their list of recently forclosed homes. From what I hear, most of which are already sold.

The other issue with REALTYTRAC is their cancellation policy. From what many are saying and first hand information, REALTYTRAC continues to bill your credit card for monthly services EVEN AFTER YOU HAVE CANCELLED. Sometimes it takes several call to them then finally a stop payment call to your credit card company before REALTYTRAC will actually stop charging you.

Don't take my word for it, a simple search in Google for REALTYTRAC CUSTOMER COMPLAINTS will bring you enough other information
Further information on the REALTYTRAC "Scam" can also be found here

At the end of the day, REALTYTRAC offers a service, this service may or may not be usefull to you. The key is BUYER BEWARE. Like anything, do your research and if the risks are worth it, feel free. Otherwise, save your money.

Other hot searches for the day include merck layoffs, yakov smirnoff Apparently there is a Yakov Smirnoff Theatre), spider eating bird (Don't they all?), golden orb weaver spiders (Maybe for the new pet spider eating bird - actually the Spider ate the bird), Glow in the dark cat, and american airlines. Of course there are more but they all relate to Sarah Palin and her Vagina and Obama

I've got a Big Bang Theory for ya - Kaley Cuoco

So the Internet is buzzing with people searching for NAKED PICTURES OF KALEY CUOCO the sexy blonde babe from the Popular TV Sitcom Big Bang Theory. In addition to starring in Big Bang Theory KALEY CUOCO also starred in 8 Simple rules with the late great John Ritter.

I'm not one to argue with the search for beautiful naked women, particularly NAKED PICTURES of KALEY CUOCO. The thing is, if you take a close look at the nipples and the clit of the various pictures they don't seem to match. Ah fuck it, it is a hot naked female body with Kaley Cuoco on top.... who am I to argue with the logic.

To see the NAKED PICTURES OF KALEY CUOCO and judge for yourself, click HERE

Looking for a New Vagina???

I gotta say, this one kind of caught me off guard. So I'm sitting on the dumper this morning doing my typical blog whoring activities and what to my wondering eyes should appear but anewvagina.com on search stats I see. OK, so the whole pickpocket elmo has gotten me thinking of Christmas before Halloween.

Anyways, being the fan of vagina's that I am, I decided to research the topic. Though hours (Well ok minutes SO FAR) of careful study, I discovered this doctor in Atlanta who does Vaginal reconstruction surgery. I'm impressed, they even have close up pictures of PERFECT PRIVATE PARTS to spank to.



On a more serious note, what would possess anyone to get their pooter chopped up. I looked at alot of the before and after shots, and to be quite honest, I had no problem with the before shots. A Vagina is what makes a woman unique and altering it because it doesn't fit some strange view of "normal" is really kinda fucked up.



Women in Africa are being forced to have their clit's chopped off, while these women who have the freedom of choice are choosing to alter the beauty that is a vagina and get anewvagina.com. Now that is fucked up. See for yourself, here are some before and after shots.











Admittedly, there was at least one picture in there which looked a little scary, however that looked more the be as a result of some mutilation more than anything. In addition, this clinic seems to offer some sort of vaginal augmentation service. By the looks of things, they botox the sides giving a more puffy pussy look. Similar to the ol' lip botox thingy. I don't know about you, but Botox comes from Bovine Toxin, isn't that like Mad Cow??? I don't know if I want a Mad cow anywhere near my penis, I don't care how "pretty" it is.





The Moral of this story... Don't Worry, be happy with your Vagina. Letting a Mad Cow anywhere near it can only result in problems.



If, on the other hand, you are set on getting a "new look" for your pooter, they can be found at anewvagina.com

We Are Canadian Hear Us Vote (In 2 months or less)

Britney's Sauna Scene and Sarah Palin's Hustler Porno aside, the news today is filled with Election fury. No, not the US Election, the Canadian Election. Laugh as you may at the complacency of the Canadian public, we get things done. We don't sit around talking about the vote for two years. Shit, most of our election signs will still have that fresh off the press smell as they are taken down. Our election was announced and completed in less time than it took for Barack to babble through his last blithering of leftist rhetoric.

Speaking of leftist rhetoric, I am glad to see the Canadian voters did not fall into the NDP "Our economy is hurting and we are here to help" load of crap. The last thing our economy needs is higher taxes created by the need for cash created by pansy assed equal distribution of wealth bullshit.

Not that we really had to much of a choice, lets look at our choices.
Steven Harper-Bush - The quintessential lapdog to Georgie Pordgie's dogma train
French Guy who can't speak English and not 5 years ago wanted to split Canada in two
Jack Layton the left wing crack head unemployed bum union sympathizer
And some twit tree hugger who has less of a chance to get in power than Paris Hilton has of winning a Nobel Peace price for her academic contributions to the world at large.

I guess a minority government isn't all that bad. After all, the last one did manage to reduce the GST a couple of times. Most likely an election ploy, but appreciated nonetheless. Ya ok, so we followed Georgie into his silly war, but these people in the reserves did sign up for the Army, OK the Canadian Army, but sometimes there is more involved than picking stuffed animals up from a flood zone. The cost involved kinda sucks but most everyone figured it was a good idea at the time.

Once again, I'm just glad Canada won't be overrun by treehuggers, frenchies or unions.

HORNY GOATS and WEED

I gotta say, this story caught my attention. It has long been known the Chinese will eat, lick and generally ingest ANYTHING that gives even a remote chance of increasing their Penis size. Since the country is so overpopulated one must give some credence to their methods, although reproductions is as simple as stick penis in vagina and move back and forth until it spits up.

Simplicity aside, the Chinese culture seems intent on eating dried up whale penises as well as the sex organs from various animals looked at as Verile. That being said, eating grass to get a boner doesn't seem all that far fetched.

Apparently there is this grass appropriately called "HORNY GOAT WEED" is the newest weapon in the battle against the flaccid penis. Italian researchers are now looking at human and animal studies in the effects of this new found wonder weed. For now, you can probably still go to your local Chinese herbalist to get some but I'm sure the drug companies will come up with their own pill sized version before too long.

Britney Spears Sex Tape 2008

So now there is a new SEX TAPE, this one of Britney Spears.
Not that I don't want to see Britney Spears in lurid sex acts for two hours flashing us her constantly changing breast and bare pooter the entire time. Even the pink wig, although kinda strange is by far not the most disturbing part of this sex tape. The part I have a problem with is Monkey man Adnan Ghalib. Those who know me, know I do not like donkers in my porn (Unless it is my donker) and even then, I prefer a higher 'gina to dick ratio. So for future sales information, anyone planning on releasing a BRITNEY SPEARS SEX TAPE in the Future, you might want to consider replacing the Male with a female... perhaps Lindsay Lohan or some other equally messed up Hollywood starlet- Just not Paris Hilton, I've had enough of her SEX TAPE.

 

For More on the Sexy Pop Tart
Britney Spears - Including a few naked shots

Truth, Justice and Killings in Texas

The latest Internet rumour has Laura Bushing killing her high school boyfriend in Texas. Some of the stories report she backed over him, while others say she ran a stop sign and hit him. To further add to the confusion, one report doesn’t even mention that he was a boyfriend and simply states a fellow classmate.

Whatever the case and regardless of my disdain for the Bush family as a whole, the apparent public interest in this story is rather disturbing. If in fact this is true, one has to ask what the relevance this story has today. I did notice some of the stories surfaced right around the last election, which seems to do even less for the reliability of the “facts” contained within. One thing for sure, this story seems to demonstrate politicians will go through almost any lengths to slam the competition to the ground. Scary thought that truth and justice seem so far from reality in American Politics.

On a side note, while contemplating this story, a thought came to mind. In Texas, the penalty for killing another human is Death. If, on the other hand, you are the president of the United States of America, murder is permitted and forgivable if it occurs on foreign soil.

In the bible, lying is a mortal sin if, however, you say sorry in private all is ok.

Yes, I am in Canada and we Spell Rumour with a "U". We also know the difference between terrorists and tourists. Sorry for the rib to all my American Friends (and wife)

NAKED CLOWN CALENDAR - Red White and Naked All Over

So the hot news topic this morning is the mad search for pictures of Naked Clowns.
So the story is, there is this group of Clown graduates (Apparently there is a school for being a clown - Must be by the same guys who came up with Introductory basket weaving.) Regardless, these clown graduates decieded to come up with a fundraising idea for Multiple Sclerosis.

Taking a page from the Movie Calender Girls, these naked clowns decided to come up with a NAKED CLOWN CALENDAR. Yes, you read right NAKED CLOWN CALENDAR. I guess this NAKED CLOWN CALENDAR will not be gracing the walls of the local Coulrophobia chapter.

Earth Friend Gen - Gennifer Moss, the Water Whisperer

Master Peace... With the positioning
of her hands, it looks
like Gennifer Moss is Mastering
more than Peace....
I kinda struggled with where to put this one, part of me thinks this woman smoked a little bit much of the Ganja or is on some sort of perma Ecstacy trip... Either way she does seem a few bricks short of a load.

Gennifer Moss' message, though, does seem to flow (no pun intended) towards the respect and enjoy Mother earth thing but she seems intent on promoting this EMOTO PROJECT thingy. Something else I tried to grasp but at the end of the day it was almost too etherial... Listening to the water talk, Don't Bogart that Joint Buuuuuddy. Me thinks this Japanese Doctor is just grasping for the Nobel peace prize like some rabid Britney reaching for her own source of recognition.

Of course there is the underlining message of peace, what having some half baked chick rollerblading around Oregon with Pasties on is doing for peace is beyond me, but I guess it got my attention (She does have a nice body after all.) Gennifer Moss, has a few naked pictures of her floating around the internet SEE NAKED PICTURES OF GENNIFER MOSS HERE, has garnered alot of attention through her Myspace page, Youtube Video's and by scaring small children in her rollerblading escapades.
I guess at the end of the Day, Gennifer Moss (AKA Earth Friend) is telling everyone to enjoy life and nature, while promoting the hippy ideal of peace. Sadly, being the cynic I am unless proven otherwise, I see it as some stoned little bink being recruited for an interesting Guerilla marketing scheme. Either that or this Doctor Emoto guy schtooped her during his visit to Oregon and she is some sort of crazed fan stalker groupie chick.

Who know, this whole blog is starting to sound like some senseless babble. I haven't had my coffee yet and muh butt hurts from some digestive issue I seem to be going though now (Must have been the Spice Almonds)... that is my excuse and I am sticking to it.

For those who are interested, here are a couple of links
Gennifer Moss NAKED
The whole water whisperer site

VAPORIZER Hits Google TOP 100

DUDE!!!!!

Sorry, just had to say that. Drugs hitting the Google top100 list isn't really new. It seems everytime some pre-pubecent pimple faced piss-ant geek knocks it off because he Overdosed on some household product or some prissy little pop star (Ehem Britney Spears) get wacked on some concoction of cough Syrup and god knows what we get to hear about it and the pimply faced teenagers search for it.

Today was no different except a little. It seems the world is looking for information on VAPORIZERS. No, not those Vicks dealies that fill the room with the smell of Canfor. I'm talking the VAPORIZERS best known in Cannibis Culture as the best and cleanest way to smoke Marijuana.

I ordered one of these puppies awhile back (For Purely health reasons and of course nothing to do with smoking Marijuana, Dubya.) Hold on, "STOP THE TRAIN" as my slightly bent grade 10 math Teacher would say. This is NOT a shameless product promotion blog. Fuck, it's called Spankin the Monkey for Crying out loud.
Anyways, back on topic. I ordered this VAPORIZER from a company online called RXDirect2u.com or something like that. Actually, exactly like fucking that.
So back to the topic (For some reason my mind is wandering.) ummm where was I?
Ummmm.....

Oh ya, it was fuckingggg Grrrreat!!!!!!!!!
Check out this funky Vaporizer, Mine is the Purple one (Kinda like the Britney Drink.) Actually because it is named after King Jimi!!!!

Nobody's Hero - To Quote Neil Peart

I kind of toyed around with which blog to place this post in for abit. I was contemplating MonkeyGuano, simply because of the Human stupidity involved but at the end of the day, it is really about my opinion and that is what this blog is all about.

Michael Thomas Gargiulo was arrested in connection with the murder of, Ashley Ellerin, Tricia Pacaccio and most recently Janecia Peters. These murders, although very disturbing, are unfortunately not that uncommon in our modern society. The thing which makes this case unique is the connection to Hollywood.

You see, Ashley Ellerin was Ashton Kutcher's girlfriend at the time of her murder.

Aside from the murder itself, the one thing which really disturbs me is how the prime focus of the media on this case seems to be towards Ashley Ellerin. I'm not saying the murder of Ashley wasn't tragic and doesn't deserve the attention of the media, however, there is very little mention of the other victims or even the whole reason this Michael piece of sub-human filth was picked up.

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Search Trends for "Ashley Ellerin Picture"

Further to add to my disdain is the Google searches that followed. It seems the general internet public is on a search for pictures of Ashley Ellerin. I'm not saying people should be searching for pictures of Tricia Pacaccio or should not be searching for pictures of Ashley, I am simply pointing out my disapointment with a society which feels the need to separate an individuals' importance by degree's of or connection to fame. Had Tricia been dating one of the Jonah's brothers at the time of her untimely death, I'm sure she would have been the top of the search engines. Sadly though, she passed before reaching her true potential as the focus of media whoring. I don't know, but maybe that is better for her and her family.
In case you actually read to the bottom of this page, the above picture was meant in no disrespect to Angela Joesbury, her friends or her family. I am merely trying to illustrate a point. Just so you know, Angela was one of the Pickton Victims.

Spankin' The Monkey Addiction

I added this blog to my collection a few weeks ago but never really ran into anything that really screamed to be written in here. Well, with todays' blog whoring came the answer.

Apparently, David Duchovny has entered himself into rehab for sex addiction. Shit, this guy is married to hot babe Tia Leoni, how could he not be addicted to sex. So what if he jerks the gurkin to clear his mind every once in awhile, maybe Tia is feeling a little sore down there so he signs himself up for a TV show like Californication.

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Who are we to judge, I applaud David Duchovny's desire for sex. And if Tia is feeling a little left out after David is "fixed" she is welcome to come to my house and I would be quite happy to fulfil her needs. No need to reward me for my generosity, I'm just that kind of guy... Always thinking about the needs of others.