So this is Canada Eh!

Gone are the days of the Canadian Icon, dressed in red serge with a dead beaver hung over his back. Although when one thinks about it, North America was discovered by a directionally challenged Christopher Columbus on his search for another route to South East Asia... hense the misnaming of the Natives as "Indians". Perhaps the lack of Sari's, Curry and veiled references to Gonesh the Elephant headed god of almost everything would have been a good clue.

The thing is, this blog is nothing about Christopher Columbus or the discovering of North America, so I should really get on topic.

This morning I noticed the cover of the Surrey Now (A local newspaper in the Vancouver area of Canada) contained a picture of a hot Indian Chick (South Asian variety) blowing a kiss and wearing a Sari. The title read "She's Game for Adventure." The chicks' name is Poontang.... oops Poonan and, no, she is not competing in fear factor, she is hoping to head to the Miss World competition as a representative of Canada.

So this brings me to the question... what is Canada? Did I fall asleep and miss something? Where are the Beaver pelts... where is the back bacon... how about the all important "Two Four"... Have we lost our identity?

I guess Christopher Columbus was not all that far off, just a few hundred years and the representantive for Canada in the Miss Universe competition is wearing a Sari. So here is the question of the day. In order to properly represent Canada (Eh) should Poonan Punni be required to show her Beaver? After all, it is the national animal for Canada.

Mothers Day Searches - Useless Children

It seems technology has taken over for pure common sense and grey matter in today's children. There seems to be no problem or inability for most to go to Google and type in what they are looking for but simple things like HOW TO MAKE A CUP OF COFFEE seem to have gone by the wayside.

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With today being Mothers day, many useless twat's and basement dwellers are searching for ways to thank their mothers for the years of free rent and of course pushing them out of her hoo hoo dilly in the first place. Ergo the hot search topics of the day. Check these out, they are great for a good laugh

free printable mothers day cards

Come on people, she gave birth to you, spend "a buck fiddy" and get her a real card you stingy shit. Or at least grab a pack of crayons and make your own.

how to make french toast

Really quite simple. Scramble up some eggs, pour in a little milk. dip bread in milk fry bread. You could also add sugar to the mix and sprinkle the egg soaked bread with cinnamon

how to make scrambled eggs

You can't be fvcking serious!!! This was number 4. Look up the word scramble, that should give you a hint... Honestly, can you walk and chew gum at the same time?

how to make an omelette

Pretty much the same as scrambled egs, kinda like a scrambled agg pancake with cheese on it.


cooking bacon in the oven

Ya ok

Fathers day

Wrong month people, learn how to use the schedule on your PDA

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The Axe on BRAZILIAN WAX

I was muddling around the geeknet looking for interesting stories and stumbled across this little tidbit about New Jersey Health Officials proposing a BAN ON BRAZILIAN WAXING. What can I say, the title caught my attention. Apparently, there have been a couple of BRAZILIANS GONE BAD in New Jersey and the officials wanted to get control of the situation before women all over the state got sore pooters.

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This story reminded me about a conversation I had with a customer of mine right around Valentines day.... Yes, I talk to my customers about shaved pussy's. Anyways, this particular customer owns a beauty salon and she was saying BRAZILIAN WAXING appointments go up a few days before Valentines day. Aside from a boner, my immediate response was... not in my household. So of course, being the curious individual I am, I asked my wife why not. Apparently not a good idea, response was fast and furious and included a suggestion that I have my Netherland forest waxed. NoT A FRICKIN' CHANCE.

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After that day, my new found trivia on BRAZILIAN WAXING became water cooler banter whenever I had the opportunity to bring it up in mixed company... kinda the way I fly. Anyways, another customer in the salon business brought up an interesting and very disturbing commentary. Apparently, she has several "Male" Clients who like to get their no no naughty place waxed. Being the homophobe I am, my thoughts immediately went to "How gay is that"

At the end of the day, it seems the New Jersey Health officials got hold of their senses and decided to drop the whole silly idea of BANNING BRAZILIAN WAXING. Women... and apparently men, can now rest in peace knowing they do not have to suffer through razor burn and stubble to get the pre-pubescent race car clean look.

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NEW JERSEY PROPOSES BAN ON BRAZILIAN WAXING

Nobody's Hero - To Quote Neil Peart

I kind of toyed around with which blog to place this post in for abit. I was contemplating MonkeyGuano, simply because of the Human stupidity involved but at the end of the day, it is really about my opinion and that is what this blog is all about.

Michael Thomas Gargiulo was arrested in connection with the murder of, Ashley Ellerin, Tricia Pacaccio and most recently Janecia Peters. These murders, although very disturbing, are unfortunately not that uncommon in our modern society. The thing which makes this case unique is the connection to Hollywood.

You see, Ashley Ellerin was Ashton Kutcher's girlfriend at the time of her murder.

Aside from the murder itself, the one thing which really disturbs me is how the prime focus of the media on this case seems to be towards Ashley Ellerin. I'm not saying the murder of Ashley wasn't tragic and doesn't deserve the attention of the media, however, there is very little mention of the other victims or even the whole reason this Michael piece of sub-human filth was picked up.

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Search Trends for "Ashley Ellerin Picture"

Further to add to my disdain is the Google searches that followed. It seems the general internet public is on a search for pictures of Ashley Ellerin. I'm not saying people should be searching for pictures of Tricia Pacaccio or should not be searching for pictures of Ashley, I am simply pointing out my disapointment with a society which feels the need to separate an individuals' importance by degree's of or connection to fame. Had Tricia been dating one of the Jonah's brothers at the time of her untimely death, I'm sure she would have been the top of the search engines. Sadly though, she passed before reaching her true potential as the focus of media whoring. I don't know, but maybe that is better for her and her family.
In case you actually read to the bottom of this page, the above picture was meant in no disrespect to Angela Joesbury, her friends or her family. I am merely trying to illustrate a point. Just so you know, Angela was one of the Pickton Victims.